Out of anyone in your address book, with whom would you most like to have lunch today?
I would have to say my mom. On Saturday we found out that she has lung cancer, and it's Stage 3. So I just really want to be there for her right now, no matter what bad things have happened between us in our past. It's time to put that all behind us and really band together for this new fight. I'm her medical power of attorney so I know it might come to me having to make some really hard decisions for her. But I know what she wants and more than anything she just wants to be comfortable. I never thought that at 21 I'd have to be doing this, to be going through this, to be even thinking about it. I realize that's incredibly selfish of me. So I just want to be with her right now, but I'm 100 miles away. Tomorrow and Wednesday, though, I'm going to visit her. She has her second chemo treatment on Wednesday and I'm thinking we are going to get a better idea of what we're dealing with pretty soon.
This is hard.
Show us a picture of your father.
Why do you blog?
Submitted by littleduckling.
Why do I blog, hmmmm....You know, I've often asked myself this question, and I feel like I come up with a different answer every time. I've got so many reasons to write down my mundane everyday happenings....I think.
- I blog because I want to remember what happened in my life twenty years from now.
- I blog because I want someone to remember me.
- I blog to do something good in my life.
- I blog because it's my outlet and I think that sometimes, if I didn't write down these things, I would go absolutely CRAZY.
- Because it makes me feel better when I really can't say these things out loud sometimes.
- BECAUSE I WANNA.
- And because I can.
What are you most looking forward to this weekend?
This weekend is super exciting for me because everyone moved out of the dorms! It's so quiet here, it's like heaven. Total heaven. And today is the umpteenth annual Kentucky Derby party down in Delphos (it's hosted by Derek's dad), so that means that Derek and Evan and I are making our way down there...which means that I'm making a CD for the car trip that will include us singing along, loud and out of key. Last year the car rides were a total blast. I'm not much into horse racing and gambling, but it was still really fun. And I'm just looking forward to getting out of Toledo for a few hours so I just hope it's really fun.
I'm also looking forward to being on duty tonight, believe it or not, because that way I'm stuck in my room and forced to pack all of my belongings up. I think I have to be out tomorrow by noon so I just have to get that done. I can't wait to get out of here and go to Greece in 5 days and live with Derek for the summer.
But hopefully it should be a pretty good weekend.
Show us your favorite flower.
I've got a few favorites. :)
Stargazer lilies.
Calla lilies.
And orchids.
Mmm, flowers make me think spring. I can't wait to start seeing flowers. Speaking of flowers, you all should try the new scent at Bath and Body Works: Enchanted Orchid. At first I thought it would be flowery and grandma-ish, but it's absolutely amazing. It has this alluring kind of sultry to it. And Derek loves it, so that's a mega plus...go out and try it!
Hope everyone is having a happy Easter!
Show us something you're allergic to.
Red onion. Equals itchy, red, blotchy skin, watery eyes, tight throat, shortness of breath, and hives. Pretty fun. I didn't even learn I had an allergy to these until after I started working at Subway. I guess working around them did me in. haha. Weird allergy, huh?
In honor of Johnny Appleseed Day, show us a tree.
Man, I miss forests. I can't wait until it's warm enough outside for Derek and I to do our metropark walks in the forests. :)
What's the biggest leap of faith you've ever had to take?
I feel like I've had to take many giant leaps of faith. One that I can remember now seems to be a more recent one: finally deciding to give up on Constantine, and realizing that things with Derek could be good...if I only relaxed and let myself feel the way I did about him. Oh man, I was in denial! I totally denied my feelings for Derek for months. First off, I didn't know how he even felt about me in the first place, and I was so engrossed in my stupid pseudo-relationship with Constantine that I kind of looked away.
But when I finally just looked at him and let all these feelings rush in, admitted to myself how I felt, and, when he asked me to be his girlfriend and the non-commitment part of me was screaming NO, I decided to say yes. That was my leap of faith.
And here I am, over a year later, happier than I've ever been. Guess things truly CAN work out.
It's fall. Definitely. Chilly and rainy. Leaves aren't so green anymore. And I have the sniffles.
Don't get me wrong, fall is definitely my favorite season. I'm still wearing flip-flops. I love wearing jeans and hoodies. I just love fall.
Today is the type of day where you sit next to a window in sweatpants and warm clothes, covered with your favorite blankie, warm apple cider or hot chocolate in hand, just watching the rain or reading or listening to whatever you want to listen to. I think today is a good Sufjan Stevens day. It just works with the weather.
School has been keeping me busy lately. I guess that's the only excuse I have for not writing in this since September 4. Lots has happened since then! I took a trip home with Derek, went to Indianapolis to see Derek's sister with him and his mom, and I have taken four or five exams. I've done well on most all of them!! I'm also working a lot this weekend at the desk, and I've picked up my old job at BBW. It's better than Subway, by far.
I'm loving being in love. And watching the seasons change and the days pass. Knowing that my love is getting better and better every day. It's been almost eight months! I can't believe it. On one hand it feels like forever, but on the other hand, it feels like just a few days or weeks. I really love Derek, he's really changed my life for the better. He took these broken pieces of what used to be Vickie and made me into some semblance of a real person. And I love him for that. I want everyone else to be as happy as I am.
My dad made chili for the girls at home. Today is a good chili day. And I really am sad that I missed out on that.
What small act of kindness have you done in the last thirty days?
Submitted by One Kind Act.
I try to help out people when I see they're in need. It's just my nature. I was at court a week or two ago about my speeding ticket, and this lady that had gone through the system like I did that same day had locked herself out of her car. She was really nice, and even offered alternatives for me as far as my court date and she let me know the way to get the points off of my license. She asked for a ride to her house, and I said yes, even though she could have been an axe murderer or something. She was elated and it was nice to see.
I also had some extra money laying around after my refunds came back for my grants and scholarships. I saved some of it, but I gave $450 to Derek to get his license back (he had lost it about a year ago). He was a little taken aback that I'd do something like that, and maybe even a little upset. But I had the money laying around. I do that sort of thing with my refund checks almost every semester. Sometimes I give it to my dad to help him out with bills and things. Sometimes I use it on myself, which I don't like doing. And this time, it was his turn. It felt good to see the smile on his face. :)
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Today's five years to the date of my grandma's death. I miss her so much. She was my best friend, my role model, my everything. But I feel like she's with me. That's a good thing.
You should stop neglecting this blog. ;) read more
on QotD: In Heavy Rotation